theinternetisbad replied to your photo “YOOOOOOO, CHECK OUT WHAT I JUST GOT IN THE MAIL! They still have them…”



I’m so happy right now


They still have them in medium and large if you’re interested!


Y’all remember sexy Bill Gates?


No. 55



Vocativ has released an excellent interactive graphic mapping trans rights across the country. Visibility and societal acceptance are progressing, but there is so much left to do. (via Vocativ

Well, I guess we definitely need to move back to Mass.

This is… probably the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever done.

There was a time in my life when I planned to make my own webcomic. Looking through my old notes, it seems like the name I had settled on for the comic was “Not Funny” because apparently I at least had a tiny inkling of self-awareness at the time.

There were two main characters, Melissa and JoJo. Melissa is the one with the afro. It was going to be a rainbow afro. You can see the lines that would have divided the colors. She drives an icecream truck, and I guess her top is just bandages because I was so bad at drawing actual clothes? JoJo is the cheerleader. She’s an Eagles cheerleader, to be exact, despite whatever is on her uniform in this picture.

Supporting characters included a self-deprecating self-insert, some kind of weird technogoblin-looking motherfucker named Greg, and an alternate universe version of LITERALLY DR. JOSEF MENGELE. WHAT THE FUCK.

Melissa and JoJo were girlfriends. I was kinda new to the idea of lesbians at the time, but I knew that I was ALL ABOUT IT. Unfortunately I hadn’t yet developed the self-awareness to know that I was also being a TOTAL CREEPO about it.

Looking through my notes here, it seems I scripted the first 30 or so comics. The first 11 are self-insert bullshit between myself, expositioning about how to go about starting a webcomic, and one of my IRL best friends, Zak, who simultaneously plays the straight man and LITERALLY JESUS.

Comic #12 features our first introduction to Melissa and JoJo, in which JoJo walks into the the room dripping wet, and Melissa makes lewd comments about it.

Comic #13 brings us back out to the self-insert bullshit again so we can complain about comic #12.

We go back to Melissa and JoJo again, for one more comic of nothing but blatant innuendo, before returning ONCE AGAIN to the self-insert complaining about the previous comic. I clearly didn’t have any confidence in my work thus far (and with good reason) and I guess I was trying to lampshade myself as overtly as possible.

Comic #17 is labeled “FILLER?” and from what I can tell, was just going to be a single panel of Melissa and JoJo in bed, presumably after sex. Melissa is smoking. JoJo is crying. Did I think that this was funny for some reason? Who knows.

Comic #18 is more innuendo, with JoJo implying things about her sexual liasons with other Eagles cheerleaders, and now I am starting to get queasy and I don’t know how much more of this I can read before I start trying to remove my own skin.

Skipping ahead a bit, JoJo wants to do “something fun” this weekend. Melissa suggests that they go TO THE MOON????? Their car “doesn’t go up”, so they go to see Greg the technogoblin-looking motherfucker in order to see if he has “a car that goes up”. Greg is building a robot cat that fires lasers out of its mouth. They all decide to go river tubing instead. Melissa and JoJo haven’t brought their bathing suits but it’s too late. They’re already on the road. Greg is driving. JoJo says that since they don’t have bathing suits, they’ll just have to get naked. Melissa and JoJo proceed to get naked in the back of Greg’s car, while they are still driving around in public. They start making out, and I’m starting to vomit in my mouth a little bit, so I’m going to stop here and let’s forget that any of this ever happened, okay?


I just found an overview of the eventual “Not Funny” timeline. It seems Dr. Mengele is introduced when he blows up a children’s hospital with Melissa inside. She barely survives, and Greg ends up turning her into “Inspector Gadgetress” OH GODDAMNIT and then I guess the comic turns into Sliders. Melissa, JoJo, and Greg chase Mengele through countless other dimensions. Some choice selections from my list of possible alternate dimensions include:

  • Clowns?
  • Chibi
  • Fight Club
  • Everyone wears hats 24/7
  • Bubbles?
  • Pirates(MP3) vs. FBI
  • Violence (horse and buggy with spikes)

There is also a World War II dimension, presumably Dr. Mengele’s home dimension, next to which I have written, cryptically, “Trojan Godzilla (America takes Japan)”.

I am so sorry. I am so sorry. I am so so so so sorry.


why is this picture on my computer

At one point it occurred to me that, since I was really bad at drawing literally everything, maybe I should just doodle nonsense. At least that way I could be sure that my proportions would never be totally wrong.

This was my Salvador Dali phase.

Here are some more pictures I drew, that I don’t think need any explanation.

I’m thinking these are all from 8th and 9th grade.

A conversation I was having with Devin ended with me looking through a folder filled with years of scans of my terrible terrible art from middle school and high school. Here you can see a drawing from my 8th grade math class notes. On the right, you can follow the process I went through while trying to design a logo for myself. This was when I thought that I would some day be a famous flash animator.



Bob’s Burgers feat. My Neighbor Totoro(1988) 

you gotta be shitting me

Bob’s absinthe-fueled Thanksgiving Totoro fever dream made me laugh harder than I have in years the first time I saw it.


Y’all remember WE GO PLAY HOOP?


Y’all remember WE GO PLAY HOOP?


New rule: don’t use the Latin word “cum” in place of “with” in English unless it’s part of a set phrase, or you have a really good reason.

Yes I’m talking to you, Slate.